I Hate Leadership

Over the past few years, I have noticed more and more students telling me they not only don’t care about leadership, they actually hate it. How can you hate leadership? What did it ever do to you? As it turns out, lots of bad stuff.

When I get into it with students about why they hate leadership, I start to understand they have a good point. The word leader gets thrown around a lot and many times parents and teachers use it as an unattainable goal that students should all be striving for, yet when they look at the world around them, every leader they see is letting them down. Teachers, politicians, parents and youth workers all play leadership roles in their lives; yet often times their leadership leads to disappointment for students. If that were not enough to sour them on leadership, student leaders in their world are just positional leaders who got there through looks and popularity and offer no real change or help. Our students are convinced that leadership comes through natural selection and if you’re not selected, why even give it a thought? This produces two kinds of people in the leadership world: those with it and those without it, and those without it may as well just start hating it now. I am starting to hate leadership myself. At least, that kind of leadership. Because this world and our churches need these students to lead today and in the future, what do we do to turn it around?

Leadership doesn’t hurt people – people hurt people. I know you’ve seen this statement before, but it was something about a gun and you really didn’t like it. But there is some truth here and as simple as it sounds we need to help students understand that leadership in itself is a powerful tool. In fact, nothing great in this world has ever happened without it. The problem is people who misuse it. So how to do we untangle the web? We need to start by teaching leadership as a set of principles that you apply to your life. Everyone can be a leader, for leadership is learned. For example, when I explain to students they are to use the leadership principle of intentional communication to bring concise and clear communication to their friendships and that through this communication, they will go deeper in their relationships, they quickly become interested. Their mindset of leadership changes, as they see that this is actually leadership and it can affect their everyday lives.

To turn this mindset around I believe we need to teach three points about leadership;
1. Leadership can be learned. Leadership is a set of principles that we apply to our lives. You can receive a free list of these principles and teaching points by going to www.leadertreks.com and checking out the free resource area.

2. Leadership can benefit everyone. There is this general idea that leadership is somehow a chosen position that someone magically invites you to become. Not true – everyday you can choose to be a leader or not to be. The decision is up to you. If today you decide to stand-up and start serving others you might be a leader. You don’t need a vote or an appointment; you just need a heart. Anyone can benefit from leadership because everyone can choose to be a leader.

3. Leadership can change everything. Remember when you were a student? Everything was decided for you – you couldn’t change a thing. Not today, for students now are making a real difference. If it’s the students who raise money for wells in Sudan or the ones who give up their shoes for prom and wear sandals, to the ones who are raising money to start a bank to make micro- loans. Students can and are changing everything – leadership has the power to do that.

We really need to change students’ mindset on leadership. The church is one generation away from being out of leaders. As I see it we have two choices: help this student generation understand the power of leadership by allowing them to lead now, or turn our backs and see the church suffer in twenty years. It’s not much of a choice.

What are your volunteers thinking

When I study youth ministries, I am always interested in watching the adult volunteers. You can tell a lot about a ministry by how the volunteers interact with students. If the adults are all bunched together and only talk to students to tell them when the meeting is starting, or where the bathroom is located…you have a ministry that’s in trouble. The truth is, most adults are afraid of students. They want desperately to help them and they don’t want students to get into trouble, but ask them to build a mentoring relationship with a student, and they can’t. The problem is not skilled-based, but fear-based. As youth workers, our job is to break the fear and release our volunteers to build life-directing relationships with students.

When you think about it, fear keeps us from lots of things - deeper relationships, meaningful conversations and implementing risky ideas. It's also the thing that keeps most adults from volunteering to be a small group leader or a mentor for students. One of the best ways I have found to deal with adult fears is to name them and talk about them. I suggest that you make a Power Point presentation listing all the fears that adults face and deal with them one by one. This is the list I use:

Top Ten fears of Adult Youth Workers
10. I'm too old
9. I'm not hip
8. I don't speak their language
7. I'm too smart for this
6. I don't know what to say
5. I don't look the part
4. I don't know enough about the Bible
3. If students ever knew what I did in the past...
2. I can't relate
1. Students won't like me

I place a funny picture next to each fear, which serves to release the tension and gives me an easy opening into an often difficult discussion. I have found that these little fears are powerful and gripping to youth ministry volunteers. Quick tips and silly stories will not be helpful for most adults. I start by sharing some of my own fears and how I have dealt with them.
Here are four great ideas for helping adults overcome their fears of working with students:

1. Take them back to their high school days and ask them to think about an adult who had an influence in their lives. I remind them of the power of this relationship and how it shaped and molded them either positively or negatively. I then connect the dots for them and encourage them to be a positive influence in a student's life.

2. Describe for them how a student thinks. Students see us as larger than life; people who have all the answers and are worry free...little do they know. As adults, we tend to think that students see us as equals, but for the most part they don't. A positive upbeat adult will always attract students. Students want to know what they think you already know.

3. Bring in a ringer, someone who has had success building relationships with students, to tell their story. This can be a member of your current team or someone from the congregation. These personal ministry stories can be powerful for people on the front line of ministry. Have your ringer share a fear and how God helped them overcome it.

4. Focus on the results. I often find that people who are in a fight to reach a mountaintop, don't make it because they never look up. They see the problems, but never the results. Have a student share how a relationship with an adult made a difference, or have a student share how they view the adult leaders. You may also just want to share results that you have seen.

The key to a successful youth ministry is how many adult volunteers you have in deep relationships with students. Remember, people don't talk about their fears. If you think this isn't a problem for your volunteers because you have never heard them talk about it, think again. Here is my challenge for you, spend twenty minutes of your next staff meeting on this and watch the reaction. Don't be afraid.

Building Relationships 101

Every fall, youth workers want to train their new volunteers to be impactful with students. That starts with volunteers building relationships with students. We understand that if our volunteers are able to build these strong relationships, then students will turn to them to learn truth about Jesus Christ. So we must train our volunteers to do this, but how? If this relationship building is so important what resources and tools are you giving your volunteers to insure that these key relationships are being built?

Let me share a simple tool we use at LeaderTreks. First of all, if you want to build relationships with students, then build it over their favorite subject…themselves. Students love two things; themselves and being discovered. Ever hang out with students and just listen? Their conversations are only about themselves. They never ask a question of each other, they just try and one-up everyone else. You can use this to your advantage. First, be honestly interested in who they are, and second, play a game of discovery that we call 100 questions.

We teach every one of our staff and interns this "game," and its extremely effective when talking with students. When we play 100 questions, we start off by asking a basic question. For example, "Jim, what is something you like to do?" Then after listening to him, we take his response and ask a deeper question from it.
Jim: "I like to listen to music."
You: "What type of music do you like to listen to?"
Jim: "POD, Jimmy Eat World, Sister Hazel, Matchbox 20... You know the good stuff.
(Note: take one piece of information and ask about it.)
You: "Oh yeah, what do you like about Matchbox 20?"
Jim: "Rob Thomas is amazing."
You: “What is so amazing about Rob Thomas”
Jim: His lyrics are incredible.
You: What makes them so great?
Jim: He’s really passionate about what he’s singing.
You: What are you passionate about?

This game starts with questions about what the students is wearing or what their favorite music is, but it ends with the questions about where they are with Christ. Each time you ask a question you should take it deeper and deeper until you reach the most important questions about where they are with Christ.

The great thing about this game is that you can truly invest in a relationship and not know a thing about Rob Thomas or Sister Hazel. You are showing interest in their life and really caring…one of the key steps to maximizing relationships.
When training your volunteers in this game, don’t just tell them about it, have them practice it. We have our staff break-up in to groups of two, and one person starts asking questions. I give them five minutes to ask as many questions as possible using this formula. Then I yell switch and the other person starts asking questions. I am always amazed at what people can learn when they are intentional about discovering someone else.

Warning: When playing this game, most people will want to break into someone’s answer and start telling a story. This game is best played when the adult volunteer asks, and the student answers. The volunteers should only be asking questions, never talking about themselves (This can be tough).

Give this a try at your next staff meeting. It just takes a few minutes but it could give your volunteers a tool that will help them build a strong relationship with a student.

Students Can Do More

Clean water pours in Esperanza

In 2004 LeaderTreks made the commitments to help 100 villages in the mountains of Guanacaste, Costa Rica by partnering with the local churches to meet the communities’ greatest need. To date we have help 8 churches meet those needs. We do it by bringing students leaders that have a vision to solve the world’s greatest needs.

The Problem
I just returned from Esperanza, Costa Rica where a group of high school girls installed a new clean water system for a local school. The story is simple; a church of 5 in Esperanza was not having an impact on their village. In fact the Catholics worked very hard to keep them out of anything the community was doing. When the need for a new school arose the church was quick to offer to help. In Costa Rica you can’t get funding for a school or teacher without a clean water supply. The community would have to come up with the money, an engineer and a work force to complete the project – with their limited resources this was impossible. The pastor of the church knew of other communities that LeaderTreks had helped. He quickly came to us with the need. Once we heard about the project, our team met with the church and community leaders and made the offer to help in the name of the Jesus Christ and the church. This would be the first time the church was given a role in community development.

The Solution
Honey Rock is the northern campus of Wheaton College and is one the premier camps in America focused on leadership development. LeaderTreks (LT) and Honey Rock (HR) have been partners for a few years working together to give student leaders a different kind of leadership experience. In the spring of 08 leaders for LeaderTreks and Honey Rock traveled to Esperanza and met with the church and community leaders. We saw firsthand the need and the opportunity for the church to have impact on their community. We also visited last year’s project (El Jobo) where we had installed a similar water system. The church had grown from 14 to 43- we praised the Lord and encouraged the local pastor. LT and HR agreed we would build a new clean water system in Esperanza. Honey Rock has a six week program called MPT; its design to help student leaders see their potential in changing the world for Jesus Christ. This year’s group just happen to be made up of all gals, after a few weeks of preparation the team arrived at LT for additional leadership training and trip preparation. Installing a water system and living in a rural village in the rain forest are both large challenges.

Part of the solution is the LT team in Costa Rica. We work with engineers to design the water system and local supplies to help us lower the costs. We also work with a spiritual team that is providing training for the local pastor. We understand that the water system is just the start of what will happen in this village. We want to also prepare the pastor and the church to meet the spiritual needs of the community.

The Project
When we arrived with the team not many of the 60 to 70 villagers were there to say hello. This seemed odd because usually the whole village participates soon it was very clear that something was going on behind the scenes. We quickly found out that the whole village had a meeting before we came and the Catholic parents were told to keep their students away for our team. Sad, but I knew once we started playing soccer and hanging out with students, everyone would join us.

Our two student leaders in charge of the water system walked the whole length of the system and started making their plan for the construction. Other team members boiled water and set up the make shift kitchen while others unpacked.

The next day we started the project – a small number of church members joined for the adventure. We started by bushwhacking our way through the rain forest to the water source, a spring flowing from the top of the mountain. We hauled tools and pipes up a steep mountain. The engineers had laid the whole system out months before, and the student leaders held these blueprints. It took a little while for the students to feel comfortable while they learned about assembling a water system in a jungle full of bugs and monkeys. But, by lunch on the first day, they had it down. Over the next 10 days, they dug their way for 1.5km to the location of the new school.

Every day, the pastor and a few members of the church worked alongside of us. As you can imagine, 12 high school girls + 4 sustenance farms = a lot to learn from each other. The days were fun and full of hard work. On the last day, we turned on the water system for the first time…and no water came. These were intense moments while we walked the length of the system following a pipe that was buried 12 inches underground. The two student leaders were patient, as they reviewed the plans and considered what to do next, looking for wet spots along the way. With little success, they listened through the air valves for any sign of water, only a trickle could be heard. We all agreed the best idea was to cut the tube at the highest point to reveal a potential pressure problem. When we cut the tube It turned into the Buckingham fountain in the middle of the rainforest. We had found the problem, and added an additional air valve to add some water pressure.

The water poured! We turned the system on once again, and water burst into the holding tank. The pastor, the farmers, and the students all yelled as the water came flowing. Students started asking “can we drink the water?” I said, “of course” and water bottles soon were full of potable water.

Student leaders can be part of the answer for some of the world’s greatest problems. If you would like to learn more about a student leadership mission trip contact LeaderTreks.

The materials you need to build a student leader

Standing waste deep in freezing cold water, I knew we were in trouble. It wasn’t water trouble, it was leadership trouble. On this backpacking trip, Peter and Lindsay had the responsibility of getting our team 30 miles through the Alaskan wilderness. Every night we had a designated camp where we had to stop. From where we stood, there were two mountains and a major river to cross before reaching camp. So far, Peter had been meticulous at picking the route, and under his leadership we were safe and dry. But now, he had turned the map over to Lindsay, and Lindsay had only one thing on her mind…getting to camp as fast as possible. This mindset led Lindsay to reason that the quickest way from point A to point B was a straight line. After 20 minutes under her leadership, we stood in the swamp.

Even though I was cold and sopping wet, I was in luck. I had all the materials I needed to develop two student leaders. Over the years, I’ve come to learn that there are 3 materials you need to develop a student leader.

1. People: Standing in the water, I gathered the team around and asked a simple question… “How did we get here?” One of the quieter students piped up and said “we gave the map to a doer”, she was right. Peter had been had been this intense thinker, who carefully plotted out our every step. Lindsay on the other hand, was a great doer. She just wanted to get where she was going. The change had spelled disaster for our team. .. I asked the students another question “do we need lindsay?” The answer was a very quick “yes.” We needed Lindsay because of her heart, commitment, dedication, perseverance, and ability to motivate the team. I explained to Peter and Lindsay their value to the team. I then asked the team, where is the best place for Lindsay. They all agreed, in the back. From the back, she could encourage those that were struggling, and she could use her perseverance to move the team. We were all pleased to give the map back to Peter. Having a leadership mentor there for Peter and Lindsay, helped make a teachable moment out of disaster. This is what every student leader needs. A mentor or guides that will not judge their mistakes, but will help them turn their mistakes into wins. If you’re reading this, you probably realize that you’re one of those people.

2. Place: The second thing I had going for me was the place. You might be thinking a swamp isn’t the best place, but here’s why it was. Students need a place where they can own leadership responsibilities, and make decisions that lead to success or failure. That map gave Peter and Lindsay ownership. Just the simple task of figuring out where we were and where we were going created a leadership laboratory for them. Decisions that have real consequences require student leaders to be more intense and take more risks. This will mold your students into better leaders. As leadership mentors, we need to find more experiences where students own the consequences. These experiences need to be engaging and something that the students are passionate about. Not just the leftovers that no one else wants to do.

3. Peers: The third thing I had going for me was that Peter and Lindsay were working together. When student leaders work together, there is a natural sharpening and challenge factor that takes place. The expectation is higher, and the students feel like they can dream more and take more risks, after all, someone is in it with them. A peer can challenge and stretch the leadership potential of another peer in a way that an adult could never accomplish. When doing student leadership development, make sure that there is more than one student in charge. When students are paired up or working in teams, synergy is built between their ideas and their actions. Intangible growth takes place in the process of peers leading alongside other peers.

The 3 building blocks to great student leadership development are people, places, and peers. As youth workers, we need to be intentional about putting these building blocks into place. Are you and your adult volunteers mentoring students as leaders? Do your students have a leadership laboratory where they can own their decisions? Are they working together, or spread a part? Answering these questions is tough, but vital to building your students into leaders.

Five Questions to Ask When Hiring a Youth Pastor

It’s that time of year, and many churches are looking for a new youth leader. Someone in their late 20s, married with two kids, and eight plus years of experience in a larger church… you know, the dream candidate. I love it when churches call me and ask if I know anyone who fits this description. I tell the church that this person does not exist, and if they did their church is paying them well and won’t let them go.

OK, so how do you find the right person to work with your students? Believe it or not, asking the right questions from the start can make all the difference. Many churches miss this opportunity by getting swept away in the fact that their students really like a candidate. But the likeability factor can be a formula for disaster. Likeability has nothing to do with a youth pastor’s ability to help students grow in their relationship with Christ. So to avoid this temptation, and make sure ask the right questions.

Here are five vital questions to ask when hiring a youth pastor.

1. What is your process to develop a student’s spiritual life? Remember, you are not looking for an activities director. You are looking for someone who has insight into how to connect a student’s heart to God’s. How is this person going to use evangelism, discipleship and mentoring, not just as activities, but as tools that develop your students?

Warning: You’re not looking for a long-winded answer. You’re looking for spiritual maturity. Every student’s spiritual needs are different. Does this person have the wisdom and sensitivity to lead your students in spiritual growth?

2. How are you going to develop your adult volunteers? Adult volunteers who disciple students are the backbone of every great youth ministry. Youth leaders need to know how to recruit and train their volunteer staff in order to grow the ministry. What is your candidate’s track record in working with volunteer staff? How willing is he or she able to empower a volunteer?

Warning: Some youth leaders like to be the center of attention and are unable to give away control to their volunteer staff. This will only stifle the long-term growth and depth of your youth ministry. You are looking for someone who can empower a volunteer staff to mentor others, by transferring their own skills and abilities to each volunteer.

3. How are you growing as a leader? This question may seem simple, but the effectiveness of your youth ministry is based on the leadership level of your youth leader. If the youth leader is growing in his or her own leadership abilities, the youth ministry will most likely be growing as well. A youth ministry will naturally take on the personality of their example. A teachable youth leader is magnetic around students. Their humility is seen as authentic, and the students will begin to take on the same humble traits.

Warning: Do not hire a know-it-all. Your youth ministry is limited by your youth leader’s ability to grow. As a leader, he or she needs to be able to set goals, cast vision, recruit adults, inspire students, etc. Remember, you cannot give what you do not have.

4. Where are you at with Jesus? Spiritual maturity is a key to leading a healthy youth ministry. When the head of the ministry has a dynamic, growing spiritual life the organization will reflect it. Do all youth leaders always experience dynamic spiritual growth? No, but they have discernment to know when the dryness is lack of desire or spiritual challenge.

Warning: Listen carefully to the answer, and ask follow-up questions. Don’t assume that just because they are a youth ministry candidate that they are a good spiritual fit for your church. Ask lots of questions related to this topic.

5. What is your plan to develop leaders in the ministry? Healthy youth ministries develop leaders at multiple levels. What is this candidate’s plan to develop student leaders, college interns, and adult leaders in the ministry? Listen carefully, not for a three step plan, but for any indication that this is even on their radar. Anyone can talk about leadership, but the answer to this question will tell you how important it is to your candidate.

Warning: It takes a very mature candidate to think at this level. Don’t be discouraged if your candidate is not there yet. The real question you want answered is, do they have humility to get there someday?

There isn’t a right answer to any of these questions. But the answers to these five questions will tell you a lot about your candidate’s understanding of youth ministry and their potential to lead your students.

Warning: Don’t compromise. There are a lot of people out there who just want to hang out with students. Make sure you take the time to find someone who will be transformational in your student’s lives.

So what’s going to be different next year?

Whether this ministry year has been a good one or a disappointing one, you have to ask yourself how will next year will be different? Many of us do the same thing year in and year out, but if we want to see our ministry grow, we have to change what we do. Most likely, your skills have been growing, your understanding and relationships with students and parents are growing, so it just makes sense that your ministry should grow too. But that won’t happen unless you’re intentional. So how can we use this summer to grow our ministry next fall?

Here are three suggestions:

1. Attach Critical Success Factors to Your Mission.

Critical success factors are the most important things your youth ministry must do in order to accomplish the mission. Every youth ministry has a different success factors, but here are some examples: establishing a student leadership team, developing adult staff into mentors, getting parents to buy in and serve in the ministry, etc. So with your mission in mind, write down the five most important things that need to happen in your own youth ministry.

2. Set Goals and Action Steps.

For each one of the critical success factors, create a goal that helps you accomplish that factor during the next ministry year. And then create action steps that you want to take in order to reach that goal. Think of action steps this way: You are on one side of a canyon and your goal is on the other side. What are the planks (or action steps) that you need, in order to build a bridge that takes you to the across this canyon?

Example:

Critical success factor: More parent involvement in the youth ministry

Goal attached to that factor: 10 new parents serving in the ministry

Potential Action Steps: Start a parent newsletter. Send a monthly parent update with specific ways parents can serve. Hold a parent recruitment night, where veteran parents share their testimonies about serving in the youth ministry. Start a blog for current parent volunteers to share their experiences. Start a parent prayer team.

3. Cast The Vision.

First of all, realize that casting a vision is not explaining how we are going to fix last year’s problems. Casting a vision is showing people the future. Once you have your goals set, use the summer to plan unique ways you can share your goals and your vision throughout the fall. You cannot accomplish your goals by yourself. That’s the bad news. The good news is that there is a whole church behind you to help, so be careful not to keep this vision to yourself. When we don’t cast the vision for our church, our volunteers and our students, we limit the impact to only as far as we can reach. When we cast the vision regularly, the impact extends as far as a church can reach. Always be thinking, how can I cast the vision?

In order to make next year better, you are going to have to do something different. Be intentional about what you are going to do. Use the next couple of months to think it through. Set goals and action steps. Communicate your plans. And make sure that next year is different than this year.